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This Is It.

This Is It.

 

Well this is it for me I have come to the understanding I am fucking loser and it is now time to walk away from it all, I said in my last blog if I couldn’t get people talking and just get bullshit social media likes then I was done and this is it!! I wanted this for the last 2 years to get a message out, to build a community where one doesn’t belong as so many suffer this and have no recourse nor understanding of what in the fuck is going on in their heads much less what to do with it, and let’s not forget all of the amazing lies everyone is telling about weed and this being ok with the vast majority of folks and I am now ok with it all do whatever you like.
I really thought when we began things under the new name we would have seen things go better but they didn’t and I am truly sad that no matter what I do unless its act like a fucking loser bitching and complaining nobody pays any attention and with the negative we already have why in the fuck do we want to create more in all honesty I don’t and won’t. The reality is nobody gives a fuck unless they’re here and since so few are I am alone and will remain that way until I die, I thought I had longer and really would but not like this as it does nothing but make me feel worse then I already do. I have found a couple of friends I will continue to talk with and enjoy but that is it, I mean fuck we made a topical for people bitching and fucking complaining about this and that and all we asked was a fucking review seems simple doesn’t it? I would have thought as well but sadly it’s a fucking secret and if this is you and your offended you should be but now I don’t give a fuck and don’t want to hear a word on the topic again or I will lose my mind, so now is not the time to say a fucking thing it has all been said and now well we can part ways knowing things are good and we both don’t give a fuck makes total sense. 
  People that blog say don’t quit think of why you started, and well this is simple I wanted friends real life mother fuckers, along with the ones around the world I have made all 4 or 5 of you and if after 2 years of acting like a monkey on a string and still getting my feelings hurt everytime I think I do something good and again expectations others will understand when you don’t give a fuck until its you. I am very angry and bitter but this is my decision and it will be final this time I have already walked away from the book which I didn’t think was possible and the rest is gravy now that I know I am alone in this fight. I do find it funny we are shitting on the cops as they don’t get Mental Illness and NEITHER DO ANY OF YOU FUCKING WEIRDOS AND MOST SAY THEY SUFFER FROM IT BUT CAN’T EVEN SEE SOMEONE SCREAMING FOR HELP IN A BLOG FOR ALMOST 3 YEARS..JOKES ON YOU ALL!! The first way to combat it is to truly give a fuck and well we are seeing how many do aren’t we? I truly hate being this angry and resentful but it is what it is and I don’t give a fuck anymore which is proof by this smile on my yap not a fuck to give to walk through the rest of life alone with no expectations of others,to be part of it. It bothers me to walk away but I am the only one it bothers this is forsure and being born before all this social media shit makes it easy to walk off into the sunset and not look back as most who pushed my hand have found out I don’t give a fuck when pushed and well this is it obviously so what the fuck am I droning on about as nobody will fucking see it and if they do I get a lil ole like on my shit save it pound it don’t want nor need a like, I have needed a friends and more people like me but I am to much of a fucking loser to fit in anywhere not my old friends, not new, not social media, not the concussion legacy foundation so fuck you all I will sit with my knowledge and make my life better without anyone else so take care I guess..

 

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My Mind Is More Confused By The Day.

My Mind Is More Confused By The Day.

 

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

 

Well here we all sit as seemingly intelligent souls all trying to make our way in this new and most certainly fucked up life, when my mind is more confused by the day, and in a time where as adults we are getting told what to do and how the fuck to do it since “it is in our best interest”, I think Hitler said the same to the Jews and the Americans to the well everyone before they fucking destroyed yet another innocent country over oil or some other thing the greedy elite require for their posh lifestyle like all of the panic buying, house foreclosures, and other bullshit going on in this world in the name of the flu! Yes the fucking flu has killed more but so has a lot of other things since its less than 1% dying of this fucking nonsense that everyone in the blue collar community are losing all their shit over this fucking joke, as they set the stage for the next 2 bunches of bullshit in the Swine flu 2.0 and Bubonic Plague both we in the states last year as well as Legionnaires Disease traced back to a malfunctioning cooling unit with enough mold to well kill almost 100 if I recall correctly and yet nothing was made of it, not like the gun pointed at China currently. It is hard for me to believe that an Orange child rapist like Trump could kick this much shit off an now that it is coming to an end we must now relive the whole fucking Epstein bullshit since the American government is going broke they need to steal every nickle they can from his estate and from Ghislanes now as well, she will be another freak death while in custody.

It seems to my uneducated eye that we are now adopting the Americans sick mentality of being afraid of our own shadows and yes of course I don’t drink the fucking China kool aid this is a design for the rich bought and paid for by the Americans and now they will reap the rewards of fucking with so many in this world, dropping other governments to instill and inject their poison on the rest of us, seems I am a little American politics and lemming jaded as you all make my life and more like me just as fucking difficult as you can by your guessing and assumptions based on your fucking Facebook Phd, I truly think if most of you had the ability to truly read, write, and think for yourselves sadly most are just fucking pilons in life never doing fuck all but getting in the way. My mind is gets more and more confused as those supposedly in the know say “masks save lives” and than 10 minutes later “they should only be worn at certain times” and now we are seeing cities, and counties making mask mandatory but depending again which “expert” of the day this isn’t a good idea, and let us not forget 1 very important thing here we are in a free country and if I went out and someone told me to wear one I would fucking beat you like a savage dog because you won’t tell me what the fuck to do and that is that, if more people were dying of the flu then of opiate overdoses then I may give a fuck but I somehow doubt it and until someone wakes the fuck up and realizes this is all smoke and mirrors for bullshit then this is life as they have now kept the Emergency measures act in place until 2021 as our cases decline and fuck off with your stupid bullshit about a second wave, wave my nuts on your chin it would have more effect. Let’s talk Sweden shall we I finally found some information on actual numbers and 53 thousand deaths isn’t that bad since they didn’t lock down. If you listen to the lying cunt American news and scientific community they play all this per capita nonsense to make things look worse take for example my hometown of when I was coming up 27 thousand strong was dubbed by the RCMP and OPP as the cocaine capital of Ontario per capita does that mean we had more coke heads then Toronto or Vancouver fuck no dummies it meant per thousand we did which proves fuck all since we were a tourist town with an artsy input we will say so its all in perception just like the .0000006% of the world that has died from the Covid flu seems like we need to grow something and stand up and take our shit back, but this won’t happen as everyone’s ego won’t allow it and this again is how the government is going to take total control of everything and everyone and if you think I am wrong here is a little case in point, when we were coming up they installed red light cameras well I forget how long it took to make it unconstitutional but it wasn’t a year and just the other day the major cities announced it is back of course in the terms that make it acceptable and for our safety just like the lockdown, and every other thing they have deemed for our safety like making pot illegal and oxycodone legal and well we seen the lemmings and still do falling off the cliff on that one now don’t we?

I come from a time when free thinking and free speech were real things not like the last 10 years where we are all so soft and the wind direction makes some totally lose their fucking shit, yes we have all seen the youtube videos about just how fragile these little nancies are grouping up to become the mob of moral awareness all to busy telling others how to live while their other halves fuck around kids drunks, addicts, and hookers, this is all reminding me of the great evangelical revolution of the 80s and 90s it was just as big a joke and you must repent and reform, and you must take a long hard suck because I was brought up rough and tough nothing was easy, I have made more enemies than I give a fuck about simply again because I am not telling you how great you are if your a total fuck up, I am not kissing your ass, and if your a cunt I am telling you right to your fucking face, because this is how I was brought up not to mob up and talk shit but to knuckle up and swing since this is the way things should be and if nothing we are showing the world what kind of pussies we really are where we need to get the military to look after our elderly and make this acceptable as those who did this still go uncharged and unpunished without a care in the world but fuck me sideways don’t go out without your bullshit mask for the love of fuck, head to the beach, a protest perhaps, maybe a flight to Mexico as we read tourism is picking up like crazy down there, but don’t visit a loved one or travel across Canada wrong it will cost you a $1000 per infraction or more and this is what it is all about the fucking greed again all paid for by the blue collar community. If this blog doesn’t point out to most how fucked this is and if it doesn’t spark discussion noone is reading it and I will then not renew our site because I am simply wasting my fucking time for a like on some bullshit social platform that to can suck my dick fast, not that it ever matters but thank you for following and have a great day and please don’t be a free thinker or speaker this is not a good look these days!

 

It’s Finally Winding Down.

 

True North Seedbank

 

 

 

How I Am Spending My Time.

How I Am Spending My Time.

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

How I am spending my time now is a bit different then it was and this couldn’t be better than it was even last week as I struggled with the routine change including the lack of sugar and things other than facebook to preoccupy myself with, I was in tough at the beginning but then I got the COD bug again. Those that have been following along know I got into the mobile version and then into the Black Ops 4 version and this is my shit, this is where I finally fit in, or so I think. The expectations on me are simple go in and shoot this is very easy and I have nobody as a friend in there which is even better honestly as I don’t go there to make them, I go there for community and one I don’t feel anywhere since at my age and lack of millions I don’t fit in the C.T.E. world, and I don’t subscribe to the pill pandemic, to young for Alzheimer’s and Dementia groups, and have no friends in the same province, therefore i had to find a hang out of sorts, the arcade of 2020.

This being a gamer thing was not something I had ever been interested in as I was always to busy and the only people that gamed were lazy cunts as real men had shit to do, this was my thoughts of gaming for the longest time and this really hasn’t changed much as I can’t even break the stigma for myself to enjoy. This is something I have fought most of my life however in making time to enjoy things that make me happy and really being in the gym filled that void for along time and I have been struggling with a replacement since and this is it, now I have to accept it and move on and really get into things as I now make yet another transition in this crazy fucking thing I am now forced to call a life, never really understanding fully how I got here just hoping to find some middle ground, a port in the storm if you will on those days when things are boiling over and I need an out. The nice thing for most of you is you pick up the phone, call, text, see a co-worker, family member, or someone close and vent and work through the issue at hand and yes I have Michelle but does she not have her hands full already with my bullshit, and not always having her own venting post there is only so much one can take and I don’t want to overwhelm her more than I currently do since I can be a shit ton to handle at the best of times, so the need to have something else is very important as we see our state of emergency now extended until 2021 for some stupid fucking reason it puts a mental strain on us both but me more importantly since this was the summer of no wasted time and tons of hiking for us all, and the flu put the brakes on that one which has fucked my head up a lot as I am sure those in similar situations are feeling, hating being stuck in the house and yet to fucking scared and not of the flu to go out it really is a sad spot and one that I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

I like everyone deserve to have another outlet after all don’t I? The vast majority in my position become alcoholics and drug addicts, and no weed isn’t a drug and microdosing hard constitutes drug use so suck a fat dick. Having to always keep things buried is never good for anyone and most of it is bullshit and silliness and insecurities but none the less sitting alone with it now for going on 2 years seems a little crazy but this new release of finding this gaming thing is for now what the doctor ordered as it even sees me smoke less since I am so preoccupied paying attention. The other portion of life that sees me constantly watching video after video for a days at a time with no emotion, nor at times understanding of what I am watching since I fall asleep so much while playing keeps me awake and helps me sleep better at night which to is what we are looking for, this all said it has its downfalls as well and this again is routine change but I will struggle through and find what works for me, as I always do thus making things better for us at the same time since I won’t be so focused on the drama of the day. The routine will be the most difficult to find the middle ground to which is something that in truth I have never been anywhere near when it comes to things I enjoy like work I used to love that and would work up to 4 jobs and not sleep for days at a time and with the way my brain locks onto shit this could be a 24/7 deal for a week or so but I truly hope not, truth is time will tell us what we will do it is just that simple.

The way we are looking at things now are simple I am in a good place and will sort my routine out as I always do and still think I have 2 years left doing this with any luck and than let’s hope the gaming can carry me through the rest of life in a good place and I may make friends along the way as I have in the facebook world and most are from other countries which is great as well since I then get to see things I couldn’t otherwise, so this community is coming together just in different ways than I thought possible. Thank you all for following along and our order showed up finally and you won’t want to miss the rest of the review on West Coast Cannabis this is certain we always order strains we know well and when we say it isn’t Hindu in the bag well find out more in the review and on the Podcast on Sunday again, have a great day all.

 

Forever Changing Things.

 

 

True North Seedbank

 

 

Our First Podcast Back!!

Our First Podcast Back!!

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

 

Well this weekend seen us in our first podcast back, and yes I had one alone but this weekend seen Michelle sit in for the first time in over a year! This truly was the best live we have had in along time so many new folks mixed with some old and bang what a fucking discussion was had by all of us and it really felt good to find so many other like minded folks after spinning our wheels on facebook for so long and never truly finding a place to fit in, so my theory of moving and running solo has to this point made so much more sense then trying to find this or that group of the same quasimedirecers that were in the last group trying to win the other prize and jumping dick to dick to be noticed, see that’s not who we are more specifically not who I am fucked brain or not I will forge my own way even if it leaves me alone as again we have seen in the past, with me making silly hasty decisions and cutting everything off instead of taking a step back and evaluating which is what we have done this time. The first podcast saw a lot of Canadian input on growing, laws, and the effectiveness of this so called legalization, we also shared thoughts on the quasi’s and their nonsense and bullshit which again was nice to see we aren’t alone in our thoughts and theories, and those joining were offering as you will see some great advice for those looking for the truth in using what we do to treat whatever ails them, keeping in mind it is a guideline and may not work exactly the same for you since we are all different and have different receptor needs.

This first podcast back proved to me that moving things is the best decision we could have made, and those who truly wanted to be apart would follow regardless and this came true as we averaged 7 viewers the entire live something we hadn’t seen on the book in so long it wasn’t funny so another huge win for us as far as I am concerned, not to mention the new folks chatting back and forth in the live total strangers sharing some information which is again why we started this in the beginning to build a community of like minded people doing what works for them to make a better quality of life and this is all we have ever been looking for so thank you to those that took part in the first of many more to come. The next one I am hoping is about C.T.E. and more specifics on treating the various things and as things grow we will answer as much as possible as we did when we first began, with Michelle answering some tough questions about dealing with Dementia as she is younger than I am and how tough some days are and this to is something we share since it is the only way of truly building a group. Therefore if there is a question you would like answered feel free to email us at ourctelife@gmail.com and we will answer your question not only on the podcast but in return email as well, it again is the best and only way to truly share information about treating some of the things vastly misunderstood when it comes to Mental Health that currently are being treated or mistreated with pills which those following along understand more now why this isn’t an option than before. Thankfully we had the podcast this week as today is the day I just want to play COD mobile and ignore the world as I don’t have a lot else to say so thank you all who follow and get involved since without you doing this makes no sense have a great day and I will be back tomorrow I am sure.

 

How Fast Things Change.

 

 

South Coast Seed Bank

 

 

True North Seedbank

 

 

It Is Finally Done!!

It Is Finally Done!!

 

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

 

 It is finally done even though it has taken way fucking longer then expected it is done, and it feels pretty good to have this sense of accomplishment as it has been along time since I have really felt this and what this is exactly is, Michelle and I designed 3 gardens, sent the quote, ordered the materials and ran out just in time. This is such a good feeling to say it is finally done, most don’t know in my former life this was part of my job at many different times and I have lost a sense of that old me and the good things I could do which as most see I struggle with more often than not, and never for reasons like this most often it’s in regard to my bad temper and lack of understanding stupidity so I am very happy and encouraged as we move forward on the next project since it is still only July.
 This time last year I believe we were and more so I was sitting on my ass talking some shit about what I needed to do and when the time was right I would in fact do what needed done, sadly I talked like that until November when we had to many fucking irons in the fire and something needed to get done as we had began a couple of projects truly but none finished like we just did this weekend since they are minus a few solar lights done. This in my mind was supposed to be done about 2 weeks ago and after I went hard and hurt myself, and honestly too tired the following day it took a couple of extra weeks, but as you see compared to last year we are far ahead , and this is all we have been after since we began fighting this mystery disease eating my fucking brain is finding what works and helps me be as normal as I can be which most days is very difficult. The true reward of this all is I was outside alone for about 2 hours and this is something that hasn’t been done for that long in so long I can’t even remember, I had music blasting shoveling rock for the rock garden and the little bit of soil we had to compensate for run off and settling initially, and it was as if life was normal again the only thing missing was a case of beer and a buddy cracking jokes, well never had any funny friends I was the funny one and none were really workers like me either so I would’ve been doing it alone like the rest of life so in retrospect it was as normal as it could get. 
 The other thing that I think has helped this is we have and no not as consistent as we should have but started working out again, well I am coaching Michelle in self defence which ones well my own thing we will say, and it makes me think because of the course of life martial arts and fighting played a huge part and I have taken things from Karate, Tae Kwon Do, Kenpo, Muay Thai, Boxing, Judo, Jiu JItsu, and I have found all systems very good and no I am in noway trying to replicate the work of others like Bruce Lee, I just have a certain vision which to be honest has a lot taken from Rickson Gracie and his system from the breathing to the combative attitude so consolidation is the key. It feels good to have this all coming back and have my brain at work thinking left hook, counter and cross, low kick to single leg, to mount to finish, all brain and more importantly muscle memory, which is my best ally in this and makes me happy I did so many roundhouses, 1s, and 2s on the bag and I have always been a student of the game watching and critiquing training my fighters to be better then, simple isn’t it? I always said it was the simple things in life that I truly enjoyed and this is just further proof as most would have this all done in a day and a case or two with a friend and although I had a friend she had never built anything like this and could only help so far, not to mention our dogs who can’t be alone for 5 seconds making us both outside difficult, yes I spend way to much time with them but they’re my only entertainment when Michelle is at work and I have nowhere else to go so home it is. I never truly seen the simple things until this morning when I looked out the window and the pile of rock is gone and Michelle again can park in the driveway, a lot of the time I either forget or it feels like a dream the next day so I had to check when I woke up this morning and make sure it really happened and it really did, this also shows me there is more to come this year and further to go.
 This has given me motivation to do more to keep this good feeling going and not have to always wake up the same old sad ass fool I have been and maybe even feeling a little more sorry for myself then I even seen, and it is now time to move forward go out when I want to and do what I want to, now maybe not going to the mall of beach or hiking trails yet, but 5 feet of the property is further than I have been since last October so maybe it is time, if it weren’t for this fucking flu we would be gone all over the fucking place with me feeling this good anyway. I have always been one to mean what I say and somewhere in this all I lost that and just began to talk shit and never get anything done, this isn’t who I ever wanted to be so going forward I will be doing it and then talking about it so there will be a few new surprises coming for everyone since I used to also be sporadic and fun and although I am not certain this is attainable all the time like this morning seeing the work done and reality setting in that in the days I was out there working not a single soul walked up to me, well some old cunt rode up on his shit and waved his hands and moved his mouth but I haven’t a fucking clue what he said as I am sure he would’ve been punched in his face for his troubles, either way I didn’t have much of a fuck what was being said or if he was talking to someone else behind me never stopped long enough. If I can take this attitude out with me everywhere things will be easy as fuck to navigate in this new world of the flu, and I won’t get hassled either, I play worst case all the time because there are so many fucking drama queens out there and yes mostly middle aged white men at that, always offended by something and the first to demand you conform, and well we just aren’t the conforming type therefore we may or may not have issues.
 In closing this was also the weekend I had given for our first hike, figuring the flu would be gone and since it isn’t I guess doing the patio in the backyard today could be the icing on the cake as this is a project that has been waiting since I pulled up the patio stones in the front we didn’t want there and are moving them to the back which will make things look alot better all the way around and I to will feel so much better than I do even now. It is finally done and I could not be happier, thank you all for following along and see you live @9am eastern for our podcast on our YouTube channel and it is the first time Michelle will be joining me, off camera of course but the first in over a year now so tune in and see as we answer some questions and talk some shit, have a great day all.

 

They Say 1 Act Of Kindness Goes Along Way.

 

South Coast Seed Bank

 

 

True North Seedbank

There Is Worse Then Island Pharms??

There Is Worse Then Island Pharms??

 

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

 

 There is worse than Island Pharms Craft Cabbage if you can believe it West Coast Cannabis this place is as fuck show to put it mildly, head to their site read the bullshit, side note Island Pharms has shut their viewing down guess they think they’re product is so shitty it needs hidden from view. This West Coast Cannabis was a place we had seen and had on a list as just in case we ran short before the next crop which we did, however this was the worst choice I have ever made!! The first problem came right after the fucking order as Michelle had to email them for a fucking tracking number, the reason we went with them is they ship same day some ship the next day and we didn’t want that, but after not getting the tracking number Thursday after the fucking transfer was accepted like there site stated and they acted like we were dumb and should have waited until Canada post scanned it in, well this was the first we HAD EVER FUCKING HEARD THIS SHIT! This being said Friday, yes a fucking day later that guess what? Wasn’t fucking scanned as West Coast Cannabis had stated, I truly wasn’t surprised nor was I shocked that the tracking number never went hot until 10:30pm on the Friday, so you see we have a huge concern already as we were a day behind almost 2, but we had enough figuring even with the holiday a week should get things done, but come Tuesday the fucking thing never moved so again Michelle emailed and they laughed it off and said we had to wait until the date it was to be delivered before saying a word to them, like how fucking dare us inquire about a $375.00 order right? I mean especially now with the flu fucking shit up, so now I am fucking mad and I send the next communication about how they fucked up and we are now out and well they truly don’t give 2 fucks because now we are waiting for 5, YES 5 FUCKING DAYS BEFORE THEY TRACE THE GODDAM PACKAGE, so this may take 2 weeks or more as last I checked our package is pending now for a timeline on delivery, this we have seen before but the place we bought from got off their lazy fucking asses twice to find out they never shipped it in the first place and had at that time we not said something we would have lost them as well, so this is why West Coast Cannabis is the absolute fucking worst online dispensary thus far as not only are the prices to fucking high the monkeys that work there are as fucking useless as tits on a bull and this to is one of those shit ass places that now thinks they’re fucking mushrooms salesman, this should prove a bigger fucking joke than their shipping weed which as you can see and will hear with the video that will be in the bottom. I will say this now for those going to say well shipping isn’t their fault, suck my fat cock as how they ship is a direct  indication of their lackluster bullshit attitude see because they don’t refund, they give out a one timer of $500 to cover an order knowing full well Canada Post is losing 20% to 30% of packages so they’re essentially fucking everyone I mean our order was a cheaper one so I am certain they fuck more and more each day and most not in our position with a site and a following and yes this link will be sent to these fucking cunts to show them exactly what I think of their fucking nonsense.
This has really put a wrench in how we do things as Michelle actually went to a legal dispensary and this to will be on the same video but none the less we are now in a position where that was garbage and West Coast Cannabis is sitting on their ass watching the world go by and this truly is indicative of these fucking places that again leave enough distance they don’t feel they need accountability because let’s runback what happened to someone who took my money in the past, the war was on and you got your fucking face smashed end of discussion so thankfully for you the distance has been set you can be a cocky cunt and its ok, keep the money and the weed you fucking loser cunts need it is my guess, I am curious to know just how many got fucked by either of these places. Welcome to legalization for those reading from places other than Canada this is the thing we have seen since OCtober of 2018, the quality and service has run through the basement and yet we see all these greasy ass fucking Quaimedirecers talking shit about how great this is,again biggest fucking joke running. The thing that all these folks forget as well is what they do runs a grey area and someone like me knowing the laws and places to find them a fucking danger and tying cunts up in court with a ton of paperwork is really easy and let’s face it I am so close to not only putting the paperwork forward but also emailing my 2 law professors to teach these cunts about a $100,000.00 lesson on why being a cunt isn’t nice you see this is a small claims matter first and then we go from there. Yes I do understand my last email to them told them not to bother us simply because they process of 5 business days to wait and see if we get some dry nasty fucking garbage or another 15 to MAYBE GET A NEW ONE sent, not worth my time to continue to dialogue with an ass kissing fucking retard talking about giving this and that on our next order that won’t be coming as we have decided I am less angry simply running out, especially after the government weed fiasco its a fucking joke and waste of money so we now grow and that is it and that either lasts or it doesn’t. This song and dance from me is nothing new and something I have touched on more so in the last months as we head toward the second year of legalization it is my hope we go back to prohibition 2.0 and places like this and many others are raided and shut the fuck down since they’re as useless as the government with the wait and see bullshit while we sit without? Great practice and way to conduct business never a way I thought I would ever see pot be dealt but it is what it is and dirty cunts like  West Coast Cannabis will continue to run their scammy nonsense and fuck unsuspecting buyers.
The hopes I had for legalization to be worth it have yet to come to fruition and now places like this are also selling mushrooms and this just doesn’t sit well with me as they’re illegal and if someone can not ship pot properly how in the fuck can you expect to sell shrooms, I am someone who knows more than most on this one to and it is taking all I have not to contact a few friends on provincial and federal policing agencies and get these cunts shut down before they kill someone, and its also places like this that make me say fuck no to making shrooms legal it is just another fuck job for these fuckers and I hope you have enjoyed my review of your bullshit cocksucking business and trust me back in the day this dialogue would’ve sounded more like the thud of a baseball bat as I took my product and or money back off your useless ass, mostly I punched lots not one for weapons. Thank you all for following along and don’t forget buyer beware in our legal, fam, community, whatever other lies the pot people want to talk as again most aren’t our people and any of the mentioned in here aren’t our people. So for those wanting to work with us just be a genuine company otherwise I will be writing one of these about you to!

 

Gaia Green Living Soil Is It For You?

 

 

 

True North Seedbank

 

South Coast Seed Bank

 

 

What A Week That Was!!

What A Week That Was!!

 

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

 

 What a week it was, this week left a lot to be desired in someways and was a success in others, so let’s focus on the week as a whole since there were so many things that honestly should’ve caused me to snap at varying intervals of the week especially getting fucked by another dispensary as most know the rant well that is already done and waiting for a video to accompany. This week seen huge routine changes which again tends to leave me all sorts of fucked up and angry, but this week seen something different as yes I was angry but I was also to able to take a step back from the situations and assess some, ya I was all confused on this one to but I liked it. I really didn’t think I would get much done with the less sugar, I mean let’s face it we can not get rid of it totally as it is everything what I did was take control of how much went in and yes I have an addiction to Fudgesicles but the rest was put to bed and I went through the rollercoaster of headaches, and anger as the sugar levels dropped this is where we have been before except this time I didn’t bottom out as bad and it could be a million reasons I just think it has more to do with already having such low levels, and I know it’s about now people think I am fucked but truly the damage in our bodies done from sugar and sweeteners isn’t known as we all see the lemmings run for the newest best bullshit to be skinny or less sweet and no troubles like sugar either way its all fucking garbage and has no benefit to us and I can see it better then before because this time was not near as bad.
 We so a lot of theory work on me since we really have no other source of knowledge other then converting the medical professional’s work into one we can use and put together with the way we treat because as always for those following and new we deal with something most can’t pronounce in ways most think are bullshit and they think we are also full of shit, in any case things have been steadily changing this week and for the better which hopefully translates into the upcoming week being better fingers crossed as we truly don’t know who I will be in the mornings much less project a week away, I mean it would be nice and this is the hope we have just yet to see it and this could be the time. Throughout life I have done a fair bit of changing and didn’t really see a week like this past one for awhile one that seen me smile, pre moring bowl, I got energy back again, and even as hot as it was I went outside yesterday and did some yard work again things that had stopped again and partly due to something being pulled in my arm but that seems better and we will finish up today on a few things we should have had done by now, but will be today.
 This week also seen me take a huge step back from Facebook which is continuing to grow as the drama and bullshit being offered there isn’t for us, the lives tanked, the following is shit, and nothing is growing there essentially a fucking waste of time therefore the switch to Instagram was the smart move and now I will be adding to the YouTube channel more and more with both edited and non edited video as always as we make this summer the best we can, as I am done pissing my pants about not being able to do as we had planned this summer, and the anxiety of being out in public is tenfold, but I am done sitting alone not using this new camera to its fullest potential always snapping the same pics even I think is getting boring so time for change. When this will be is truly unknown but I am now going to be working everyday to get there again not as far maybe but different none the less. The biggest thing I realized this week was I had wasted a shit ton of life being angry always wanting to show how big my dick was and smash or get smashed attitude and I wanted to end life better then it started with a lot of folks and forgot to restart with myself so this had to happen, as I seen our almost $400 going down the drain with that order its usually a full 5 day rant and it’s a violent tirade about just how deep the broom handle will be stomped up a cunts asshole, not this week I hardly paid attention so this didn’t happen, also the walking away from Facebook and leaving that portion of drama and bullshit behind my mind isn’t near as fucked up and angry or so it seems, I mean this could be the honeymoon phase as well after all couldn’t it?
 This week had its share of ups and downs this is certain and for the first time in as long as I remember I ebbed and flowed in a way that I miss, this doesn’t mean my emotions didn’t surge it just meant my brain didn’t get locked into the bullshit and cause me entire fucking week of losing my shit over the dumbest fucking nonsense in the world and it truly is about fucking time to come to a more level ground for now anyway. We would never kid ourselves that we have found the ultimate in fixes because we would be fucking kidding ourselves but if we don’t pause and look at the good that has come from my unwillingness to quit then life is good as far as I am concerned and I am also spending more time alone not fucking with many, seems the confusion of what I am doing has left crickets everywhere, but like always it fucking is what it is I am now no more concerned with who is following then I am if my nuts are itchy. I am not everyone’s cup of tea as many love honesty they hate when mine is pointed at them as I am ok with my bullshit and short comings and have no issues these days admitting them while I am telling you yours, this is likely why I have no friends they really didn’t want to hear the truth in the way I tell it. Once those closest walk away there is no more loyalty in my opinion because well I don’t always need a fucking reason either, it is what it is right? Well fingers crossed heading into this week out of weed and with none in sight could challenge everything in here but time as always will be the teller of all and thank you all for following along and have a great day an let’s see how I am minus what helps me.

 

The Ways In Which I Hate My Brain Are Lengthy..

 

 

South Coast Seed Bank

 

 

True North Seedbank

 

The Headaches!!

The Headaches!!

 

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

Well much to our dismay the headaches are back and with a solid vengeance at that as one kicked the living shit out of me for the better part of 2 days and it all started on the right side or to me the right temporal area and smashed like a gong and then began moving around my brain from my forehead to the top of my head it played its coy fucking games for some odd reason, well this fucking disease has no rhyme nor reason. I heard from the accounts of others that this was going to happen eventually but to me this was years away when these would come rushing in out of nowhere and last for days, as some know we started with the sucker punches and now have moved on to something more severe in my mind adding an element I wasn’t ready for since I have to many irons in the fire as it is and sadly keeping shit straight isn’t my thing so to speak these days. The other issue we are seeing is the talk of going back into lockdown and essentially losing the entire year is rough since we have fought so hard to get out, and although we can sort of the troubles and potential troubles far outweigh any good of me leaving the house since my anxiety was through the roof prior for no fucking reason at all. This in and of itself could be due to the uncertainty of the world at this time, I mean this is the oddest bunch of nonsense I have ever seen in my life and I truly had thought I had seen it all but now they are already talking of the next pandemic in swine flu and doing the same build up bullshit they are still doing with the flu currently and again folks we had no cold and flu season, how in the fuck is this even possible seriously, see my attention span and how fast I am back and locked onto the lies of this bullshit it’s like poison in my brain.

We will backtrack some for those newly following, up until last October I had stayed in the house for almost a year hadn’t gone anywhere, and after wasting last year being afraid of my own shadow I swore this year was going to be different and by any means necessary, sacrifices and pushing myself is what I mean but we were going out until the lockdown came anyway. This blog is running wild again as I talk of headaches, causes, and random shit today but this is where my brain is a million places at once but not in one long makes living tough to keep up. I am constantly learning each day and today is a huge win for us as we look at all of the issues contributing to my brain hurting the way it has been, see I am generally well hydrated eating well, and I am keeping in mind my lack of sugar this week other than my addiction to fudgesicles which is better and I did go almost 2 days without them, but when I got them my headache didn’t leave until this morning, which leaves the sugar withdrawal somewhat in question but none the less it’s a factor of all these things and more I am sure as most of my blogs are more related than I care to believe or that most know for that matter.

The only thing we know for sure is that these headaches will get worse and worse if we don’t get a handle on them now, if this is even possible at this point in something we don’t know like the rest of what we struggle with. It is becoming all to noticeable I am becoming bitter and angry about everything I am someone that would generally find a high side to something as opposed to looking at the true shit show that was in front of me, now don’t think I didn’t handle things I just made better sense of it I guess the trouble is I am fighting most days to find the high side to getting out of bed. This negativity isn’t a place I want to ever live to long, never seeing joy or a better way just has never been me, as someone once asked “I don’t know how you smile with that black cloud over you all the time.” well it used to be easy I was always working towards something better not just dreaming about it like now and with this fucking bullshit flu going on, lockdown, masks, no go areas, and so much fucking nonsense and lies being told again never has the government done a mother fucker to help us regular folks, unless you count an old fashioned dry prison loving ass fucking well then that is about the government has been capable of and this time is no different. Sadly though this time it has taken a year from us we will never get back, and if this fucking goofy shit keeps up the odds of a hail mary and me making it another year drop to about a 10% possibility as I am losing my fucking marbles as it is since my brain hurts and simply can’t comprehend just how much more fucked up this world is going to get in the coming days and weeks which is seeing people ratting and talking shit about their neighbors and once friends, divided now not only by race and religion but the fucking flu as well? I think as I always do the day we can agree on one fucking thing in this world will be the end of this white privilege, rich, arrogant, ignorant, inbred, fucking nonsense as again most assholes in this world are WHITE and so am I but I think the white race fucked the family tree one to many times for reality and its time to come down off your high horse and deal with the consequences and let it be what it will be, and the sooner you do the sooner my headache can subside and we can again feel free to continue with the plans we have set out for ourselves and the quality of life we want, so maybe I am selfish but it’s about fucking time I was for the right god dam reasons I mean fuck we find every year brings a little less from me and I am hoping this fuckery is over but I somehow think next year is a write off as well. Doom and gloom sucks and when my brain is like this it is all it can focus on I mean negativity is a cancer and breeds more negativity and compounded in my brain is all bad news for me as things get tougher each day as we are currently seeing. This shit should have been left in the winter as it was last year as we powered up to get our shit done slower then this year, I know I will fight my way through this one somehow sadly I am just fucking tired of things being a fight, including buying one last time online and what a fuck show that is as we again run out and I don’t give a fuck 7 days for a fucking envelope is BULLSHIT LAZY FUCKING NONSENSE, just another fucking excuse no pity since we could have done a round trip there and back in the same time frame seems fucked up to me. So as I work through this next round of headaches and the bullshit that causes them I will continue to improve what we are doing and begin to write our book this will begin today since I have talked way to much shit about it, the time for talking is done it is time to write that part, hopefully jarring some good memories to share here as well who knows. Thank you all for following along and I hope this lets you know your not the only one losing your fucking mind during this bullshit!

 

When Your Brain Doesn’t Communicate Properly Anymore.

 

 

 

 

 

Waking Up A Grump!

Waking Up A Grump!

 

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

 

Waking up a grump truly isn’t how I had planned on today starting however my brain as always had different plans, and we maybe seeing a light at the end of the tunnel on this most recent sleep fuck up. We have noticed an increase in agitation, fatigue, and body odor on me in the morning I am sweating a lot during the night not something typical of me, therefore leading us to think this is a result of dreams in which I generally don’t remember so how do we really know, well we don’t know fuck all forsure and until I am dead we won’t either.

This morning seen me wake up this new way with an intensity you could cut with a knife, one in which seen me glaring at my own self which seems fucked up to me if your curious as I just don’t understand all of this since we thought we had things nailed until the other day when again change is in the wind and could be the leading cause of this as we know the last time I slowed the sugar intake I got nasty as well, so if 1 and 1 right? I truly think refined sugar is the cause of a lot of both physical and psychological issues and the less I use the more I see the troubles it has lead to in the course of my life and do I like the prospect of never having a rootbeer again, fuck no and yes most are going to yell sugar free and that shit is worse then sugar so to me it’s all shit, and all has negatives nothing man made is worth a fuck when it comes to this shit. This week is seeing a shit load of changes not just the book and sugar, it’s seeing us win with the topical we made in treating some physical things like I was getting leg pains arthritis, restless leg whatever the case it throbs hard and is more uncomfortable than anything and even that hasn’t been an issue since I began using this topical, keeping in mind I am talking about my left leg which is my power leg and when in kickboxing seen no less than 500 roundhouse kicks thrown with the last 25 done for show before the kids class on the wooden pillars in the gym knocking dust from the rafters all in fun and sure some ego that I now suffer from all these years later, but may have just found something to help with it lucky me. We have truly come along way in the way we are treating what ails me daily and this is how we approach things and always must, there is no forecasting how the next day, week, or month will be as we seen or some will see in the video in the bottom I was mad when I went on however that all changed quickly the reason well you will have to watch and see I mean why give away the good parts right? The fact is we are forever learning the right and wrong ways to deal with all the quirks that accompany the suspected C.T.E. diagnosis that will come post mortem but until then we must remain not only vigilant but open minded as well since I really did not think there was any harm in the small amount of sugar I was consuming, but let’s also keep in mind in those times of sadness or insecurity what feels better then some good old fashioned sugar candy, chocolate, or ever deli slices all ending up making my brain and likely many others into a big fat pile of shit that becomes agitated, angry, confused, and combative and then we are to believe it is our fault, sorry I will no longer accept that nonsense as I have it all on video the ups and downs, I have the blogs many like this confused trying to find a new way, failing on some and having some success on the others.

This is our biggest hurdle in dealing with what we and how we do we really have no point of reference it truly is balls out hit and mother fucking miss, and the main thing is relying on what makes me feel good and helps me with not waking up a grump 7 days a week. The ultimate goal for any of use is to live the best quality of life possible and it seems the more natural for me the better, I was once a truck driver and my eating habits and such weren’t what they became and ultimately what they are today so food choices have I am sure played a factor in the way things go, we have already put the high amounts of sugar together with the most suicidal and lethargic times in the past almost 3 years I will say that a lot as I am in disbelief as some days it feels longer others it feels like a minute, but then there are someday’s when I remember where I live and where I can spell and today isn’t one of those as I have a million mistakes and don’t see them yes a form of dyslexia becomes an issue like the rest weren’t enough already right? This all being said I didn’t write this to piss my pants simply give a perspective most can’t since they fight more fucking side effects then they truly realize and I don’t other then shitty choices while I have the munchies which I am changing now therefore getting rid of the negative side effets of treating with pot, marijuana, weed, cannabis, there hopefully I didn’t offend anyone in this because we all know some call it this or that and we must conform to…see I want to bitch and fight and yes I just stopped myself mid nonsense as this isn’t about fighting other to fight the urge to fight with others, what a fuck show today could be, if I was unable to distinguish I am simply withdrawing (figure of speech) from sugar as we have seen before and hopefully won’t see again as we make progress in keeping my brain calm and not agitated from sugar overload. Seems insane to some I am sure however to those that have followed along with us they know the highs and lows we have gone through so to make this small tweek in what we are doing is simple because the flip side is we do nothing and I keep consuming shit whenever I want well 7 to 8 days of this as I recall is like a psychosis for me snapping, yelling, acting a fool for stupid reasons just paranoid and angry, not a great way to live so we have come well you be the judge I went from losing weeks not understanding a fucking thing to being able to identify a potential issue in what I consume and spend my time doing and change in 2 days, keep in mind it hasn’t been bad since we worked out last night so the positive has begun but there is always drawbacks and hard days this is just one of them and hopefully one of the last for this issue. Have a great day all!

 

So You Think You Know Me??

 

 

South Coast Seed Bank

 

 

True North Seedbank

The Routine Change Starts Today!

The Routine Change Starts Today!

 

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The Medicinal Way Podcast.

 

The routine change starts today is a statement most can make and do exactly as they set out to do and at least be ok with it, this isn’t nor has it been this way for me in sometime and today has almost made paralyzed me as I have no idea what it is I will be doing to fill the time in my day now other then I guess to make our product better but then there is the whole less sugar and eating cleaner then before which truly I didn’t think was possible but it just has to be. I fucking hate this word diet like no other even moist is better for me since it brings the wrong idea as we aren’t looking to gain or lose weight just clean up what goes in especially my body as this sugar is the devil, more so than weed could ever be, this doesn’t mean my body is exactly happy about it but so far my brain seems to be starting the week better than it did last week.

Those following get how off track I get with the slightest of changes and this week I have thrown caution to the wind and quit or am quitting 2, this week and sugar so far seems to be the hardest of the things to quit since it to like coffee has been there when nobody else was, seems a crazy comparison but it is the way it has been I just never realized the true problems it was causing even in the amounts I laughed and made fun of, seems I have to eat shit once in a while to be me and today is that day as was the other. This is exactly why I never point fingers and say my way is this or that since it isn’t it is what works for me the majority of time and I was kidding myself thinking that my brain was going to tolerate the sugar surges in anyway and today is some proof since last Monday I recall being a gong show of tired until Thursday and really being a lazy fuck, today I have 3 loads of laundry done, responded to all of the Quora and WordPress comments we now have and am almost done this blog which was also supposed to happen last Monday and didn’t. The only difference is shit food and sugar we cooked all weekend had fresh home cooked meals, and this to me is the biggest difference now will I maintain this no sugar thing yes for as long as I can never forgetting the vast majority dealing with this also have some form of addictions to the point some pick up Heroine and other powerhouse Opiates as their first kick at the addiction train. So if sugar is my thing then so be it, it is better then after all and slowing my presence in the book is just as beneficial as it again was becoming a competition and an insecurity I don’t really need these days as this is a struggle more and more, therefore if I can share our stuff in a place of strangers and begin a conversation and not be told how invalid my opinion is or that I am wrong or how they are the expert, this to me is weird to be dealing with actual adults say it ain’t so. I have never been one to rely on a big movement and since nobody understands this and even fewer want to fuck with it, then those curious will find us and it won’t be the fuck on the book we also know this.

The lives being done and over with only makes sense since I can pre record things once I get there and adjusted, see I figured today would see nothing change and I would do what I set out to do and although half done not sure the rest will be done before I take a break and play some COD Mobile yes I am taking some me time in the day to not nap but do something that not only keeps my brain going but also makes me feel as though I am apart of something but don’t get me wrong I don’t accept friend requests on there anymore it’s my quiet time and I don’t want to team up or chat with anyone in there I want to shoot the cunt off of mother fuckers and chill out and not fall asleep, it is my therapy more so than music which is carrying me through writing this and I think I am coming to like the silence and the being alone, accepting that things will never be any other way. We are trying very hard to make plans to move forward and go out and be normal but it is entirely to fucked up out there current moment an no I am not worried about catching a fucking cold I a scared of catching a case over some asshole and their need to be Johnny Dogooder and get fucked up trying to make me conform to an ideology I just can’t and won’t, as someone who was bullied and told how to look, think, act, and dress, it burns deep inside me to never be controlled again and if I get the cold and die that’s on me not for you to decide guess I will be an anti vaxxer and problem to the state if you will until I die since they have never ever done a fucking thing good for their people ever so this is no different and there is a slight of hand bigger than 5G,BLM, and the Global Demise due to climate change as we will again be forced to realize we got fucked again and lost all of these rights and freedoms everyone is always yapping endlessly about since it is my right not to wear a fucking stupid ass mask then its your right to wear one and shut the fuck up see how easy life could be to go back to a time of being less offended, more understanding, and not so goddam judgemental and full of ourselves and our self righteous bullshit? These protests and shit keep me in as much as it does all of us divided for the gains of a sick in the fucking head government, and on that note have a great day all and do what works for you, and fuck everyone who doesn’t understand!!

 

The Power Of Music!

 

 

South Coast Seed Bank

 

 

 

True North Seedbank

 

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